win win

I have not been very active in writing of any kind other than academic papers. I apologize for taking two weeks with no written words. I needed the break to deal with my life, the facets that I did not want to share so decided to omit. I have the first exam of my junior year today and after doing a once over review this morning do not feel prepared. I have been trying to hang out with people and choose happyness when the option presents it’s self

that brings me into this weeks thought from Thursday.

Win win situations.

Back about seven years ago I read this self help book for starting high school. The 7 habits of an effective teen. There are 7 habit books for everything but this was the appropriate one for me at the time. The book goes over priorities and time management and how to deal with stress ect. As time marches on and that book becomes more and more of a distant memory I have to think how much did it help me?

I did very well in high school, I do okay in college but my recent attitude of the last few very fast past months has not been up to par. I have felt sad and down and there is a inner need for me to take on as much self blame as I can bare. I have seeked help and go to a weekly therapist but I would love to see her more. I have such a full schedule that to find an hour of available time to be with a friend is nearly impossible. There was a chapter in the 7 habit book about win win situations which has recently resonated with me. I have been choosing people and things as I choose fit at the moment and then later feel like there would have been a better way to handle things. Most of my actions seem to turn out win loose or loose loose. I do not want to elaborate because that would defeat the purpose of skipping two weeks of writing.

I have a few very good friends that care for me and even when I do not pick the best cource of action are there for me. There are people I am trying to mend things with and there are toxic people that need to be cut from my life all together. If something more positive than the sum of the negative to get to that point occurs; was it all worth it? (I like to think so.)

So now I have a map in my room on the wall of my room and a poster to help me remember to choose happiness when i can.

IMG_1751When I am sad I am sad… but when I’m happy oh god I’m happy

I also got to mini golf with my amazing friend Chrissy and there was this light house so i took a pic in the life is strange mindset.

IMG_1743

Nothing is black and white, I can not keep being so hard on myself. Till next week (I think) Try to do what is right own you decisions and keep moving forward.

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